KANSAS GAY READER

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Peter Pan

The Haunted Bridge

Strong City Rodeo

Class Reunion

Granada

Gay Life in Emporia

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Peter Pan

William Allen White—

Was somewhat shocked

When Mr. Barrie got

Off the Santa Fe train

Such a nelly queen—

Author of Peter Pan

BUT there she was

Mary White’s idol

WAW had built—

All of Peter Pan Park

Just to please Mary

& Her love for Peter

Down there by the—

Swimming Pool

Resplendent with

A pretty little lake

Plus a nice—

Amphitheater

Lovely trees and

Some tennis courts

WAW had even—

Built a moated

Monkey Island for

His lovely daughter

Miss Barrie gave—

A nice reading

Emporia’s citizens

So very pleased

They put Barrie—

Back on the train

And got him

Outta town fast

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The Haunted Bridge

They called it The Bird Bridge—

Named after Lorna Anderson

And her lover the handsome

Reverend Thomas Bird

They said it was haunted—

The old fashioned rickety

Wood planks and cable

Bridge over the Cottonwood

Adventurous teenagers—

Would go out there at night

After feeling brave and

Guzzling a six-pack of Coors

They’d tape ghostly voices—

Emanating from Sandra Bird

Who got dumped in the drink

Her car driven into the river

She’d howl and lament—

Giving the Faith Lutheran

Church of Emporia the

Worst heebie-jeebies

The only way to shut her up—

Was to throw the book at

Her minister husband and his

Slutty “personal” secretary

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Strong City Rodeo

“They cried

Oho ya ho!!!

O hoo!!!

Celebrating marriage

Of flesh and air”

—Wallace Stevens

“Life in Motion”

Roses are red—

Violets are blue

FFA boys are cute

And so are you!!!

Roses are red—

Violets are blue

I went Boo-Hoo

Over Flint Hills boyz!

The Strong City—

Rodeo was hot

All the handsome

Bold-legged cowboys!

I loved their boots—

So shit-kickin cool

Pointy-toed like

Marilyn’s high heels!

It was so gross—

And animalesque

The way the bulls

Farted outta the gates!

The rodeo clowns—

Saved many lives

Maniacal matadors

So extremely chic!

Cowboy and western—

Music in the bars

Chase County out

There under the stars!

The Bar-Z Ranch—

So gothic and gaunt

So lonely out there

Cute cattlemen’s sons!

I’ll never forget—

Those boyz in pickups

Cold Coors, gun-racks

Out under the stars!

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Class Reunion

Out west of town—

By the Santa Fe tracks

The Doodlebug’s wail

In the dark of night

Old Highway 50—

Where my mother

Amy Jane grew up

Way back when

Her worried parents—

Married her off fast

To a kid in a band

Before she got pregnant

She was a goodlooking—

Redhead and all the

Boyz at EHS sure had

The hots for her

It was only a—

Matter of time and

So she got married

Then I popped up

I was supposed to—

Be the Divine Child

And settle Amy down

To a nice married life

Spending summers—

Being a rowdy boy

Down by the idyllic

Cottonwood River

A Thirties nuance—

That Great Depression

Still hung around the

Looks of all the faces

Then the immediacy—

Of WWII and Korea

Pretty much did in

My mother’s marriage

Followed by Neosho—

Rural and Constitution

As well as my mother’s

Dismal second marriage

Ending up dead—

That whole drinking

Smoking VFW generation

What else for them to do?

The Gazette obituaries—

Have pretty much taken

Away all those teachers

At EHS dontchaknow

The only reunion left—

For me now is simply

My long gone nostalgic

Midwestern memories

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Granada

Swank bedazzled—

Old film palace

How did Emporia rate

Such Hollywood splendor?

Across the street—

The Presbyterian Church

And yet the Granada

Was the real Temple

Lush red crushed velvet—

Curtains and luxurious

Balcony with Moorish

Spanish Revival class

Even air conditioning—

During torrid summers

Full of Bette Davis as

Baby Jane so campy

Pushing Joan Crawford—

Down the stairs and

Reminding her that there

Was rats in the cellar!!!

Such cinematic wonder—

Spoiling us into believing

We were Barbara Stanwyck

In “Sorry, Wrong Number”

Only to stand beneath—

The blinking marquee and

Realize that it was all just

A sullen small-town illusion

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Gay Life in Emporia

“In Oklahoma

Bonnie and Josie

Dressed in Calico

Danced and stomped”

—Wallace Stevens

“Life in Motion”

They came to town—

Dressed like cowpokes

Bonnie and Clyde

There on Commercial

The boy dressed—

In Western drag

His boyfriend dressed

As a cute cowgirl

Emporia gawked—

Simply shocked

At such an affront

To their morals

Their Midwestern—

Sensibility and their

Conservative Kansas

Respectability wrecked

So into the local

Hoosegow Jail went

The lovely couple

Just like that

The stern Judge—

Finally letting them

Out demanding

They’d get married

And so Bonnie—

And Clyde ended up

Man and wife just

Like they wanted to

Bonnie was butch—

And Clyde was fem

One was bottom

And the other top

And they lived—

Happily ever after

And so did all of

Lovely Emporia
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FROM JAIL TO ALTAR

Queer Conceit of Lyon County Lovers Causes Trouble
Bride Came to Town Arrayed in Male Attire and Both She and Groom Are Landed in Jail

Emporia, Kan., Jan. 21---Queenie Martin and John M. Austin were married late this afternoon at the courthouse by Judge R.M. Homer. The wedding was the termination of an escapade that landed the young couple in the Lyon county jail only to be released after the wedding ceremony above referred to. The groom is a young farmer who resides in the north part of Lyon county, about nine miles from Emporia. He is related to some of the wealthiest and best known citizens of the county. Yesterday he was noticed walking about town in company of another slight built young fellow, and the suspicion was aroused that the latter was a girl. The two were stopped by Sheriff O'Conner, when the suspicion was changed into a certainty, and they were locked up. Both gave fictitious names, and told romantic stories. Both agreed, however, on one point, that they had come to Emporia to get married. Today Judge Homer told the youth that unless he gave his proper name, told the truth and married the girl, he would send them both to jail for three months. The above names were then confessed to. Friends who knew them were sent for. Judge Homer married them and sent them home rejoicing at accomplishing their first purpose, but considerably cut up because of the notoriety gained. (Kansas Semi-Weekly Capital ~ 25 Jan 1898)

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